12/28/2010

My Inner Control Freak

Working outside the home full time has required that I "let some things go," so to speak. It is simply impossible to maintain the kind of organization and tidiness that my heart desires when our schedule often requires that we zip out the door by 7:15 in the morning and return, most evenings, some time after 7. Dinner, laundry, homework, some amount of quality family time, my own job requirements... all that must come before acting on my urge to straighten the shoes that have been deserted on the door mat- I've trained those boys, but not well enough that they bother to straighten their kicked-aside shoes! It really is an uncontrollable urge that I have, there's no other way to describe it. I'm not ashamed to admit it, and I have taken a great deal of teasing and endured several cruel pranks because of it. No matter. It's a desire for orderliness that I have attempted to manage with medication, but after gaining 10 pounds and hosting a 4th of July party for 30 people and spacing-out on purchasing the required paper products... I decided chemical regulation wasn't worth it! OCD? I don't know. Maybe to a degree. But I really think it just comes from a desire to control something. When so much of my life spins out in the dust while I watch from the window (figuratively speaking ...for the most part!), I get a sense of calmness when what IS within my control, is controlled! Does that make sense? Ugh. Anyway, teaching full time, managing a busy family, and being married to a man who continues to work harder and longer as the years pass us by, has made it physically impossible for me to maintain much order in this house. Delegating the towel folding means they aren't all going to be folded and stacked exactly the same way and, therefore, will likely fall on the head of the person who opens the linen closet , delegating the dishwasher emptying means my spatulas might end up in the basket by the cooktop rather than their specific cubby in the drawer, delegating household chores means there will still be crumbs on the floor and dust on half of the television screen. However, it also means our time is managed more efficiently so we have time for the more important things. And... everyone learns to respect the "household" (and may even think twice before throwing that *clean* sweatshirt that is on the bedroom floor into the laundry basket if they realize they'll just be sorting, washing, folding and putting it away later). My husband graciously treats me to a housekeeper who cleans, shines, and polishes her way through the house on a weekly basis- and for this, I am eternally grateful! Christmas Vacation, however, is one time when I give my Inner Control Freak 2 days to go crazy. Broken toys are tossed and clothing and other items distributed to thrift shops. 20 Hefty bags flung into the back of a truck and 3 trips to Palouse Industries later.... my Inner Control Freak is satisfied and I am basking in the glow of the labelled bins with the appropriate contents, organized closets, and baskets of freshly "Lysol-ed and batteried" toys! Some of the organization will last all year, some will last until morning... but for now, I am a happy woman! Tomorrow, I'm back to work to prepare for the start of school on Monday... back to delegating the chores and smiling when I find my kitchen shears in the desk drawer!

Summer shoes are in the basement, winter shoes have taken their place in the closet!



50 pair of hand-me-down Wranglers, labeled with sizes and stored away!





Welcome home, spatulas!




"Broken down" machinery has been hauled away and everything is back in its respective "shed!"





All is right again in with my spice rack... Mustard BEFORE Nutmeg, of course!